LoveToKnow Weddings:AllComments

From LoveToKnow Weddings

Comments

Jenn - The makeup of the bridal party is up to you, and it's certainly not necessary to have a ring bearer if you don't have a young boy appropriate for the ceremony or if you just choose not to. The best man and maid of honor can safeguard the rings until needed, or you can even have one of the flower girls (usually it would be the youngest or oldest) carry the rings as a girl ring bearer (dressed like the other flower girls). Best wishes!

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

Is it necessary to have a ring bearer. We have 4 little flower girls so far, but the only young boy in the family is 10 and 130lbs! Can we skip the ring bearer all together or no? Help!

-- Contributed by: Jenn

Erica - You can certainly have two ring bearers without any flower girl; many couples have two flower girls with no ring bearers! The easiest way to divide their duties is to divide the rings (as little boys may argue if one gets to carry a pillow and one does not), that way they're both participating equally. Also, they should walk down the aisle together, side by side. Best wishes!

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

Question: I have two ring bearers! Is that appropriate? I unfortunately have no flower girl and I have no idea what to do....Any advice?????

-- Contributed by: erica

Kim - Normally, the bride or her family would purchase these types of ceremony accessories, but since you've had one custom-made that's a wonderful gesture. I'd suggest you simply present it to the bride graciously and let her make the choice, but let her know that whatever she chooses is fine by you (even though it might be tough since yours cannot be returned). It's also possible to use both pillows; one could be used at the rehearsal and another at the ceremony, or one pillow could be altered to be another type of decoration -- with the guest book, for example, or displaying a memorial photo or photo of the couple. Best wishes!

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

Lauren - Yes, you can use Mr. for a child, or you can use "Master" for a more formal or unique feel. Another option is to simply not use titles for the children in the program, since it can seem awkward for their young age. Best wishes!

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

How do I address my ring bearer in the program. I'm using Mr, Mrs, and Miss already. Do I still use Mr for a child?

-- Contributed by: Lauren

My son is a ringbearer in my nephew's wedding. His bride is wonderful but her mother has been a bit overzealous in her handling of the arrangements though his family is contributing towards the affair. I had a pillow custom-made as a surprise to give the bride but my sister failed to tell the mother of the bride and she bought a pillow herself. Though hers can be returned and mine cannot, I was hoping for a suggestion on how to handle this without causing conflict and putting the bride in the middle. Who would normally purchase these pillows or the flowergirl baskets, etc? What do you suggest I say or do? I hoped for this to become a tradition in our family of using this pillow down the road. Thanks.

-- Contributed by: Kim

Hi Kathy - You are technically correct - usually ring bearers are aged three to six, and an eleven year old ring bearer is unusual. You could thank the couple for wishing to include your son in their wedding, but perhaps suggest he contribute in a different role, such as a greeter or usher/seater wearing a suit or other appropriate attire. Discuss the matter with your nephew graciously but honestly to find a solution that will work for both of your families. Good luck!

-- Contributed by: Amy Finley

Hi -- My nephew has asked our 11 year old son to be ring bearer in his wedding. At the time, we were informed that the tuxedo would be covered. However, that is know not the case and the tuxedo rental fee is $170.00. We also have our twin 7 year old girls as flower girls and the wedding is out of town. Needless to say this is turning into a very pricey event for us. I would like to tell the couple that I think 11 is too old for a ring bearer. How do we gentlely bow out of this one?

-- Contributed by: Kathy

Hi Rebecca,

The choice is really up to you. Ring bearers and flower girls typically walk separately, and allowing the children to walk down individually will also lengthen the ceremony a few minutes (which you may wish considering there are no others in the wedding party). Having the flower girls and ring bearers paired, however, is also a good choice for many reasons. Pairing he children can help keep them on task and can add a sweet touch to the ceremony. For either scenario, many couples have found the ceremony goes more smoothly when the children in the wedding party have had sufficient practice walking down the aisle. Good luck!

-- Contributed by: Amy Finley

Hi cb,

Typically ring bearers are between the ages of three and six. I would suggest including the twelve and fourteen year olds as junior groomsmen. They could could each walk down the aisle accompanied by a junior bridesmaid, walk together, or individually. The article Second Weddings Plans also has some additional suggestions on including children in weddings. Good luck!

-- Contributed by: Amy Finley

I have 3 ring bearers and 3 flower girls. There are no others in thw wedding. How should they walk?? In pairs or all 3 ringbearers first and then all three flower giirs??

-- Contributed by: Rebecca

My to-be-husband has two children ages 12 and fourteen. Would that be too old or awkard for both of them to be the ring bearers or should we have them as the groomsmen? We already have 1 best man and 3 groomsmen.

-- Contributed by: cb

Whitney - Your son may be too young to serve as ring bearer - he may not be able to be still through the ceremony. If he's well behaved, however, an option is to have your mother or your husband's mother bring him down the aisle, holding his hand, and they can then take charge of him if he does start to fuss.

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

Deb - Both ring bearers could carry pillows, one with the bride's ring and one with the groom's ring for a nice match. I'd advise against having them carry anything together, because it could quickly turn into a tug of war.

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

im getn married in december and my son will be a little over twelve months old. i would like for him to b the ring bearer but im drawing a blank when it comes to getting down the aisle1 help please!

-- Contributed by: whitney

There will be two ring bearers in my daughter's wedding. Should they both carry pillows? If not, what else could they carry down the aisle?

-- Contributed by: Deb H.

Jennifer -- Most craft stores will sell the fake rings in their wedding supplies; you can check Robert's, Michaels, and similar type of craft stores. If you have a lot of trouble with that, you can also check with bakeries that specialize in wedding cakes -- they may have fake rings that would normally be part of the cake decorations that you can buy.

-- Contributed by: Melissa Mayntz

Hi. We have a young ring bearer in our wedding. We'd like to use fake rings on the pillow. Can you recommend a place to purchase these rings? I've looked around at pillows but none of them seem to come with the rings.

Thanks for your help!

-- Contributed by: Jennifer
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